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Post by cloudstar on Jan 15, 2009 20:07:09 GMT -5
Total woke up, the pain in her stomach seemed worse than ever. She must have eaten something... maybe that rabbit had been sick? She groaned and got up. "Plus?" she whispered, struggling to her sisters den. "Plus?" she said, panic rising in her voice. Her sister hadn't been there for at least a day. "Plus?" her voice was worried now. Finally she lay down where her sisters smell was old. She sniffed sadly. "Where did you go?"
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Post by » Sacrifice on Jan 15, 2009 20:10:26 GMT -5
The scent was strange, this wolf was new. In fact, she had been looking for a pack, the one she had heard of the branched off the main pack. This is where she had wanted to go, but the other wolf obviously made her skittery. "Hello. I mean you no harm. Is this the 'Misfit Pack' I heard about?" Her tone had a flowing accent, one that indicated she was not all that she seemed. But although skittery, her manner was easy. Her head was held low, and her tail was low too. But it wasn't low enough that indicated easy submission. "I am Taje." She murmered softly, dark eyes watching as the other female seemed distressed. Finally, something sparked in her eyes, and she sat down. "Are you alright? Your scent is distressed." She said softly.
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Post by cloudstar on Jan 15, 2009 20:13:54 GMT -5
Total barley moved. "My sister is gone. My pack didn't like her." she said, her voice sounding like a small child who realized the Tooth Fiary wasn't a fairy. "And yes. But Sandstone is in charge here, not me." she added.
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Post by » Sacrifice on Jan 15, 2009 20:17:21 GMT -5
A knowing light pricked into the dark orbs of Taje, and her head drooped slightly. "At least you know your sister is alive. Mine was killed because she was not liked. But this is not my story here." She murmered softly. Moving forward, she gently nudged Total in a comforting way. "That doesn't matter now." She said softly, watching Total. "You are stressed. What is up, aside from with your sister? Sometimes an unknowing idea can help." The white wolf said softly, dark eyes dancing.
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Post by cloudstar on Jan 15, 2009 20:24:58 GMT -5
Total just sighed. "So many things." she replied. "My whole pack... they don't like me very much. I irritate them, I can tell." she said sadly. "And the Leader... well... thats a very complicated story." she shook her head despairingly. "My mother left a few days ago." her sentances seemed broken, uncaring. She was slipping back into the deprission that had gripped her so strongly not long ago. She could feel the numb feeling growing in her mind, spreading through her blood and foging her sight. She felt the faint, fatal stabs at her heart as she wanted to cry out again. But by now her fate was certain. She had gone through this pain once before. And a second time. This was the third, and final time.
This time was the worst. She had been able to let her pain bleed until it wore itself out. But now she couldn't do that. The pain was so intense she denied it. She wanted to die this time. She knew the cliff was only a days walk away. "I could go. I could leave now. The pain would never come back..." she muttered. Oh, her heart longed for the final day when it wouldn't have to deal with pain anymore. "It would be like flying. It would be quick. No one would miss me. Not for long anyways..." she mumbled.
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Post by » Sacrifice on Jan 15, 2009 20:29:56 GMT -5
"Everything happens for a reason. You must have faith in thatm or else everything will fall for you. As for with the leader, well like you said, that sounds rather complicated. I won't ask about that one, because I can already guess." Yes, Taje knew a lot about life. She knew of all the downfalls, and all the times you wished for death. There was never any escape from it really, only temporary relief. At the talk of death though, her eyes narrowed dangerously, and she wacked her paw across Total's side. It was just hard enough to get her full attention.
"No. You only get one shot in this life, do you really want to end it so soon? To miss out on everything that makes life, life? If you do, then you are insane." She barked out, before calming down. "The pain may be overwhelming, but it makes you stronger. Like I said before, there is a reason for everything. As with not anyone missing you, well that is a whole lie there. You would be missed, because a pack is a family. How would you like the death of a sister? It would tear you apart, make your life horrid. How would you like to inflict that upon everyone you know? I would not wish even my worst enemy that." She barked, obviously a lot of feelings in what she said. It made you wonder what might have happened to her once before.
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Post by cloudstar on Jan 16, 2009 22:20:00 GMT -5
Total looked up at her, hardly phased by anything. "I guess." she said sloqly, as if the words were strange and unfamiliar to her. "But don't you ever wonder what it would be like to never have to worry about anything anymore... to never think or feel, or have to wonder what might hurt you next...?" she said in wonder, and her eyes stared off into some unknown fantasy.
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Post by » Sacrifice on Jan 16, 2009 22:51:42 GMT -5
The pure white she wolf sighed, shaking her head. It seemed this wolf had been depressed for a while now. "But do you really mean that? If you do, then I can't stop you, but think before you act. Never to see another sunrise or set, to see pups growing up, to have a family of your own. Are you willing to give all those things up, just to get rid of yourself, to 'end your pain'?" She asked softly, eyes dark and obviously thinking.
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Post by cloudstar on Jan 16, 2009 22:54:54 GMT -5
Total squirmed a little at the mention of pups. "A real family is just another thing the world can take away from you. A sunrise is only the moon in its true form." she said simply.
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Post by » Sacrifice on Jan 16, 2009 22:58:18 GMT -5
"But it doesn't always gte taken away. It can be one of the greatest joys you can know. Would you not love to have little kin of yours tumbling all over the grass, turning to you for everything. Of course, they get rebellious at times, but they still are fun." She said, shaking her head at the wolf's other statment. "But the beatuy is still unmatched by all." She said softly.
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Post by cloudstar on Jan 16, 2009 23:19:15 GMT -5
"I can't." Total said. It was only two words. But Total was tired of getting up after every battle, every fight, ever lie. She was tired of saying "I can. I will. I do." she coudln't bear to be let down anymore. No more sadness, no more tears. Death was like a relief to her. She knew it would be.
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Post by » Sacrifice on Jan 17, 2009 12:39:33 GMT -5
Taje sighed softly, shaking her head. "Like I said before, what you do is up to you. In the end, my word has no control over you. But just think about this before you do anything rash; although it feels like you are going to die from pain itself, what will not kill you, will only make you a stronger being. Each new pain will be easier as the pain of the past would have been much worse then the current ones of today."
Shaking off her pelt, the pure white she wolf looked at Total. There was no sympathy in her gaze, only the truth.
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Post by cloudstar on Jan 19, 2009 16:10:27 GMT -5
Total chose to ignore the other wolf as her eyes became dull and sadder. She lay completley still, and closed her eyes. The only sign she was still alive was the slow, sad rise of her back as she took breaths.
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